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You Should See His Ball Peen Hammer.

Giant_wrench

That afternoon Hank came over to help Jim work on this car. He thought Jim was overcompensating with the enormous wrench but he couldn't say anything, Jim was his best pal. They shared a pack of smokes and talked about old times. Hank wanted to tell him the truth, that wearing his wife's handsewn Vogue ensembles made him no less of a man but he knew Jim would never listen.

Together, they lifted the wrench and tightened lug-nuts well into the evening, their manhood securely intact.

Posted by Mary on July 11, 2005 | Permalink

Comments

A "pack of smokes?"
Oh no, THAT is a hand rolled joint!

Posted by: Liz | Jul 11, 2005 6:08:39 PM

Are we sure that's not a shufflepuck cue?

Posted by: Jess | Jul 11, 2005 9:24:02 PM

I agree: we got some 420 action there.

Posted by: Colleen | Jul 11, 2005 10:20:57 PM

Would the joint make any more sense if it WAS a shuffleboard cue? Just wondering. ;)

Posted by: Kathryn | Jul 11, 2005 11:11:29 PM

I think Drew Carey is regretting having these two on "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" esp. when they held up production by just staring at their items during the Props round. Where's the witty banter, the snappy dialogue, the innuendos?

Never, ever pull people at random from the audience. It's always death.

Posted by: Yorkie | Jul 12, 2005 3:00:54 AM

I wonder if Grandpa Potter, Jim, Dan, and Ted still wear these fabulous shirts?? Jim and Ted's beige corduroy shirts were surely a hit at the 12th Annual Hay Toss and Pig Greasing. I fear Grandpa and Dan might have been upstaged in their gold frocks, resentful and quietly plotting revenge in a dark corner...

Posted by: Yorkie | Jul 12, 2005 3:05:11 AM

I think a joint would make shuffleboard way more fun!

I love that someone actually made those patters for Grandpa, Jim, Ted and Dan. I bet Jim loved the beige corduroy.

Posted by: lesley-anne | Jul 12, 2005 9:19:29 AM

grandpa got gold! I wonder if it's gold lame?

Any man who will wear shirts made by his wife (like my husband) is 100% manly man!

Posted by: becky | Jul 12, 2005 1:10:49 PM

That's definitely a joint - look at the way he's holding it. He's all "put down that stupid shufflepuck and take a hit, man. I'll go score some Cheetos."

Your site is too funny :)

Posted by: Kim | Jul 12, 2005 3:17:12 PM

Okay, I'm unofficially making a retraction to read: "Jim and Hank fired up a doobie and talked about old times."

And apparently between tokes they played shuffleboard...?

Am I the only person in the world unfamiliar with shuffleboard cues? As soon as my husband saw this he was all, "You know that's a shuffleboard cue, right?"

Um. No. I didn't.

Is shuffleboard the new Bocce or something? Everyone but me is familiar with the game?

Posted by: Mary | Jul 12, 2005 3:37:34 PM

It's soooo much funnier to think of it as a giant wrench than a shuffleboard thingy. When it was a giant wrench it made me snort. When it became a shuffleboard thingy I just smiled.

Posted by: Barb | Jul 12, 2005 6:10:39 PM

it's definitely a giant wrench. I had no idea shuffleboard HAD cues. (isn't that pool?)

Posted by: Theresa | Jul 12, 2005 8:54:28 PM

The cigarette is levitating between his fingers!

Posted by: Joy | Jul 13, 2005 1:41:39 AM

I like how wrench man has two shirts with collars on them. Wow!

Posted by: Lil D | Jul 13, 2005 1:28:22 PM

I thought roller derby was the new Bocce.

Posted by: David | Jul 13, 2005 3:41:31 PM

Actually, Jim doesn't have two shirts on, that's his ascot showing through. He does dress for automotive success. I think Hank is wondering if he can make a good swap - his doobie for Jim's enormous....wrench.
Stay tuned....

Posted by: beastarzmom | Jul 13, 2005 5:20:28 PM

I never saw a shuffleboard cue that looked like that.

Posted by: | Jul 14, 2005 9:27:51 PM

Caption: "THIS'll tighten your nuts, Hank! That's it...just inhale..."

Posted by: neko | Jul 15, 2005 2:46:28 PM

Well, girls, I don't quite know what to say about a woman who stitches up a snappy little number like this, carries out the look with an oh-so-heterosexual ascot, and then withdraws her support for her man by failing to provide a pocket square! Personally, when my man goes out to get stoned and fiddle with his nuts, I like to make sure that his ensemble is unimpeachably up-to-the-minute!

Posted by: Eve | Jul 17, 2005 12:21:44 PM

Anybody else catch monkey-wrench gang member's resemblance to Fred from Scoobie Doo?

Posted by: mjae | Jul 18, 2005 1:14:54 PM

I think it is one of those culty staffs from say maybe the Masons...

Posted by: Christine | Aug 3, 2005 1:47:19 PM

Well, what's at the bottom of the thing? It looks like it could make a serviceable floor lamp.

Or is that just me?

Posted by: jfasoga | Aug 5, 2005 8:50:58 PM

Come on Hank quit hogging the REEFER. I want to see that wrench get bigger too!! Buy the way can you pass the CHIPS??

Posted by: Mike | Sep 29, 2005 10:33:56 PM

You know what they say about men with huge wrenches....or codpieces.

Posted by: Kitty | Feb 22, 2007 11:18:45 PM

Jim does look like Fred from Scooby Doo. Is that an ascot I see?
Also, where does one purchase a ridiculously over-sized, solid gold, half dissappearing wrench?

Posted by: Gunmetal Grey | Jul 14, 2008 4:25:55 PM

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