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What Do Pirates Like To Make When They're Feeling Crafty?
They like to macrame hanging plantARRRRs!
Sorry.
At any rate, this one is somewhat bizARRRRe (can't stop with the pirate jokes, am on a roll now). We've got a stuffed pirate doll. We've got a pewter solider/nutcrackARRRR figurine. We've got a first place trophy for the 1971 Skateboarding While Also Holding A Football championship, as well as a trophy for Walking On Top Of A Glass Barrel With Some Crap Inside It. And lording over the whole mess is this lovely hanging planter with what appears to be a boneless, skinless chicken breast floating inside it.
Oh, did you hear the one about the pirate who had to stop knitting?
Yeah, he found the activity to be very relaxing and enjoyable but after he lost his right hand to a crocodile it just got too hARRRRd for him to hold the needles.
Posted by Mary on June 13, 2006 | Permalink
Comments
Hardee Har Har! I wish we could zoom in on the pirate doll? pillow? and crate!!!
Posted by: Lami | Jun 13, 2006 3:25:37 PM
Is that picture an alligator playing the banjo? Is it possible to play a sea shanty on a stringed instrument?
Arrrrr, it's driving me nuts ;p
Posted by: Pittipat | Jun 13, 2006 4:05:47 PM
The doll is clearly not a pirate, but Napoleon Bonapart!
Posted by: Kendra | Jun 13, 2006 4:44:53 PM
And they have a 20-foot ceiling to hang it from.
Posted by: Marcia | Jun 13, 2006 4:52:33 PM
Watch the fraying rope, m'hearties..it won't be long now..
Posted by: | Jun 13, 2006 5:04:44 PM
Oh dear -- is that a fishbowl?? I'm feeling mighty sorry for that poor fishy. Perhaps he's the Captain Nomouth's dinner. Eep!
Posted by: Aly | Jun 13, 2006 5:05:22 PM
arr arr arrr hurllllllllllllll everbody was on acid in those days huh?
Posted by: d34dpuppy | Jun 13, 2006 6:51:40 PM
Ah, the pirate poked his own eye out with a knitting needle when he saw what his one hand had crafted. Arrrrggg.
Posted by: SageHen | Jun 13, 2006 7:23:05 PM
Just found your blog and loving it. Keep posting!
Posted by: Nikki | Jun 13, 2006 8:16:50 PM
I don't see what's wrong here. Doesn't everybody keep raw chicken parts hanging in a bowl?
When I was young my brother and I obsessively drew pictures of people not only with hooks for hands, but hooks for feet and even a guy with a hook for a head. Not one of these guys were pirates.
We probably sat much too close to the macrame plant hangers.
Posted by: severina | Jun 13, 2006 10:49:36 PM
All that planter is missing is a wee tongue depressor/popsicle stick gangplank.
perhaps it was taken away so the chicken breast/plucked pirate parrot could die in peace after walking the plank. Or maybe those crafty pirates used up all their depressors while making a pirate ship. aarrgghh!
Posted by: mimulus | Jun 13, 2006 11:11:21 PM
That thing in the bowl is the pirhana that chewed off his arrrrms and legs.
Posted by: Elliegal | Jun 13, 2006 11:36:25 PM
Upon first glance I thought the doll looked alittle like Napoleon (of Bonaparte fame.)
How cool would that be. Hmmm...
Posted by: Heids | Jun 14, 2006 12:36:35 AM
you're just a wee bit early for 'talk like a pirate day'
http://www.talklikeapirate.com/piratehome.html
Posted by: judy | Jun 14, 2006 2:10:51 AM
That's clearly not a chicken breast or a parrot in the fish bowl; it's Napoleon's big syphaletic joy stick and all relevant parts preserved in bleach and fermaldehide in the bowl, with a little sprig of parsley for a nice civilized added touch. The glass barrell holds the naughty hand that played with the joy stick too often; can't you see the little hairs growing out of it? This desk display is where the boys of the family are forced do their homework before bed-time every night...serves as a subtle warning about sex. Everything goes back to sex. Gog save the queen.
Posted by: Daffy | Jun 14, 2006 10:04:39 AM
With a hook for a hand, crocheting seems like the sensible option. No tool would be needed!
Posted by: Denise | Jun 14, 2006 11:35:27 AM
Those of us who have seen the Light recognize this as an altar for worshipping the Flying Spaghetti Monster (www.venganza.org). A devoted follower of the Pastafarian philosophy lovingly crafted this macrame image of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM) holding the oceans in His Noodley Appendages during the Creation of the World. The doll and the painting of the singing pirate are used to remind True Believers of the appropriate garments to wear while worshipping the FSM. The chosen outfit of the FSM is Full Pirate Regalia, and it must be worn at all times to avoid His wrath. The other objects on the altar remind us that we have all been touched by His Noodley Appendages, whether we are soldiers, skate-boarding football players, or glass-barrel walkers.
Posted by: Captain Krunch | Jun 14, 2006 12:03:27 PM
I remember some old movie serial where one of those hanging fishbowls was used as an attempted murder weapon. With the sun shining through it, it made a delightful magnifying glass to focus the rays on the unconscious hero's head. I think it was "S.O.S. Coastguard," with Bela Lugosi as the villain and Ralph Byrd (later famous as Dick Tracy) as the hero.
Ironically, there were no pirates in that story!
And what is a pirate's favorite letter? Aaarrr!
Posted by: Allen | Jun 14, 2006 2:15:55 PM
I'm sorry Mister Fins, but we found that file of goldfish pornography you downloaded while we were at work. I'm afraid your going to have to spend a week in the isolation unit and your little castle privlages are revoked for six months.
Posted by: Inky | Jun 14, 2006 3:16:35 PM
Are you guys sure it's not Napoleon Bonapaarrrttteee?
My love of bad pirate jokes thanks you for this entry.
Posted by: Barbiturate Cat | Jun 14, 2006 4:31:59 PM
I actually just said, out loud, "What the f**k is that?" at the doll.
"I know little Jimmy's been dead for 17 years now, but did you have to make a doll out of his favorite green velvet jacket, honey?"
And the planter is clearly a bowl to marinate chicken in. Sometimes marinades are pretty colors, right? So why not show off your kitchen skills above your collection of weird-ass trophies?
"Oh crap, it's the Walker kid again...quick, see what trophies we have left. You know it'll be a scene unless he gets something!"
And the football is for the L.A. Rams, who are now my city's "beloved" football idols.....:P
Posted by: allison | Jun 14, 2006 7:39:09 PM
On a closer inspection, that is ectoplasm in the fishbowl. Goldie didn't make it, but his dissatisfied spirit swims on.
Posted by: allison | Jun 14, 2006 7:40:37 PM
That pirate has REALLY short legs!
Posted by: Lois | Jun 14, 2006 11:10:20 PM
Hey wait a minute, that's Davey...where's Goliath??
Posted by: elliegal | Jun 15, 2006 12:03:22 AM
Ow, the puns hurt. If the last post was brought to us by the letter 'S' is this one sponsored by the letter 'R'? 'Cause we all know a pirate's favorite letter is aRRRRR.
Posted by: Brewgal | Jun 15, 2006 9:10:13 AM
